SRL Archive - Blogs and Writing

Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?

Let's face it
English is a stupid language.
There is no egg in the eggplant
No ham in the hamburger
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
English muffins were not invented in England
French fries were not invented in France.

We sometimes take English for granted
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
Quicksand takes you down slowly
Boxing rings are square
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
If the plural of tooth is teeth
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
If the teacher taught,
Why didn't the preacher praught.

If a vegetarian eats vegetables
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
Why do people recite at a play
Yet play at a recital?
Park on driveways and
Drive on parkways

You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
Of a language where a house can burn up as
It burns down
And in which you fill in a form
By filling it out
And a bell is only heard once it goes!

English was invented by people, not computers
And it reflects the creativity of the human race
(Which of course isn't a race at all)

That is why
When the stars are out they are visible
But when the lights are out they are invisible
And why it is that when I wind up my watch
It starts
But when I wind up this observation,
It ends.

-ANONYMOUS, ahajokes.com

is this your own, if it is, its briliant, good job:)

From: iloveit8
is this your own, if it is, its briliant, good job:)

Yah, even ahajokes.com has it. Lol.

:D you wrote?

Yeah, this is not his own. But, it is a very good thing to read. I read it to my English teacher my 7th Grade year.

Oh. So you didn't write it…

Maybe give cred's to whoever did write it?

Nobody knows who wrote it from what Ive seen. The only 2 spots Ive spotted this, it has an unknown/anonymous author. So I guess you can just say -Anonymous

rofl, it's awesome :p

its quite good, it shows you're much better off learning scar or some computer language instead of english
ill see what my teachers think of this… :p

Omg thid awsome, i usually never ead through long posts like that, but that was cool. Im learning spanish in school and I think its wierd because adjectives are after nouns and stuff, but now i realize how wierd english really is rofl. This is awsome.

wow you must have been bored for atleast a hour to write that lol. nice